finto__ I may have mentioned this before, but when I was in junior high school I had a dislike teacher for a long time, but one day I suddenly thought, āIām tired of dislike him. I changed my mindset and suddenly it didnāt matter anymore. Dislikingā someone is a form of attachment that is different from ālikingā someone, so it takes a lot of energy.
finto__ At the time, I probably had the perception that ādisagreement = dislikeā, and I felt insecure unless I divided people into ālike/dislikeā or both. I guess I couldnāt accept the gradation of liking some parts (that fit with me) and not others (that didnāt fit with me), and I felt safe by putting them in the ādislikeā box for now. - False dichotomy
finto__ And so, you get stuck in your own framework of thinking, and you start to see only the bad things about the person you put in the ādislikeā box. You start to look for the bad things about the person and you can no longer see them from a flat perspective. You start wasting energy in a cycle of reassurance. This is a terrible thing, and more than anything, a waste of energy! - [framework for thought - I hate the priest, but I hate the kesa too. - color bath effect
finto__ Of course, there are many kinds of ādislikeā, and I understand that itās not just cases that can be easily divided like this, and Iām not forcing you to think this way. I donāt want to force you to think this way, but Iām just saying that what you think is a gut feeling or a physiological reaction can be switched on surprisingly easily (and with a little conscious change).
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